My Journey to Art

Back in 2017 I attended a presentation by Eckhart Tolle (author of A New Earth, and The Power of Now) on his philosophy to holistic health and healing. Alongside Eckhart was his wife, Kim Eng. She was taking a yoga class before the presentation.  I was not at all interested in Yoga, but as soon as I saw (and felt) her presence – I was intrigued.  Kim Eng was light, like a feather. Etheric, really. She was wearing loose white clothing and walked around the room as if floating on air.   She shared her philosophy about life, suggesting we aim to 'become like bamboo'. Bamboo is hollow, light, resilient, and fast-growing. It reminded me of story my homeopath had shared with me a few years earlier, about how we are all diamonds drowning in ‘black muck’. It’s common for spiritual philosophies to overlap, sharing different contents but in the end reflecting the same truths.  Kim shared how over our lifetime, we accumulate energy that isn’t properly ‘metabolised’, and which becomes ‘stuck’ in our bodies. This energy makes us heavy, unhealthy and reactive.  When we have an experience, it enters the bamboo, reacts with the stuck material, and is repelled back out. We misperceive some messages, and are unable to take on others, because there is no room and too many old stories trapped in that bamboo. We become confused between the present and the past, what is true and what is false. To feel whole, we want to work through the stuck energy (ancestral events, current patterns, unhealed trauma, current addictions, and poor lifestyle choices as examples), and as we do this we start to hollow out the bamboo.  From there, we become a clear channel for our own life-force without any ‘interruption’.

I'm sure you can see that the general theme behind my artwork is healing, and spirituality. In fact, it was a shamanic philosophy that inspired my healing journey about 15 years ago. It took me a while to pull it all together, but this was the ‘spark’ so-to-speak. And it ended in me starting a painting business - how wild!! Did you know… It takes 7 years to make a Shaman?  Probably more of a lifetime, but 7 official years is how long they spend in initiation. The reason being, they need to be ‘clear’ if they are to support anyone.  If I hadn’t head of this shamanic philosophy, it’s likely I would have just trusted the usual system – but I am so glad I didn’t. I first heard of Shamans as I was researching mental health. I had been diagnosed with Bi-Polar three times, I didn’t want to take medication, and I was frustrated by the lack of understanding Psychiatrists had when it came to my experiences.  I came across an article on this shamanic philosophy which reflected a their unique view on mental health – that the person who is experiencing the crisis is actually meant to be a healer, they’re just not going through the proper initiations to move through the crisis and serve their community as a whole.  It really got my attention, as something deep inside my being resonated with that perspective.  What is a Shaman? A shaman is the medicine man of the tribe, whose job is to keep everyone healthy, happy, and connected. If someone shows signs of disease, the Shaman will identify the root cause – whether emotional, spiritual, psychological, or physical, and clear that person’s system back to wholeness and health.  They can travel between worlds – the material and the mystical – to facilitate healing for the person, community, or place in nature.  If the shaman tries to do this, but has not worked on his own ‘stuff’, he cannot be a clear vessel or receive a clear message around what this person needs in order to heal. The message will come through, but it will become entangled with the Shamans unhealed ‘stuff’.  So a shaman goes through the process of clearing their own trauma, so they can transfer healthy messages without attachment or projection from their own field.  They may also unearth some hidden talents or dreams they lost from childhood, through the process.  A real Shaman has undertaken a harrowing journey to become an effective healer, and can only become a healer once he has gone through his own healing journey. I have gone through my own version of this, recognised the difference in the purity of my support and advice to clients as I worked deeper and deeper into myself. I started taking Reiki sessions in 2017, but found myself confused and triggered so I took a break for a while. Now, in 2024, my sessions and downloads are extremely clear, and I am a much better healer.   The fastest path to health and healing is a relatively slow one, it requires working through layers of conditioning until you reach the core, and only then will you be completely whole and free. Your healing journey will take time. With each layer you work through, however, your health and wellbeing improves, and with this positive changes, you are able to then find motivation to continue. So take your time to work through your stuff – there is no rush. 

You may have heard the word ‘healing’ being thrown about lately, but what is it??? It’s quite the gruelling journey, so what are the benefits of healing your body? Better yet, is it even possible!? Yes! Healing is possible, but it looks different for everyone. WHAT IS ‘HEALING’? Healing is about returning something back to its original state of homeostasis or wholeness – which is essentially putting something back together once it has been ‘broken’. For a surface wound, we all know what healing is – the repair of a broken bone, or how the surface of the skin seals up, and the wound is no longer present. We all know the body can do that, and we don’t ever question it. I’m talking about another kind – healing your body, mind and heart. Taking a part of us that was broken or wounded and returning it back to homeostasis. This is a process of exploring your subconscious beliefs and subconscious patterns, and exploring the physical body to release stored energy and trauma. You also have to make a lot of hard choices – regarding your lifestyle, habits, relationships, work. You need to look at everything objectively as you work through the layers. HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOU CAN HEAL? Its not for me to tell you whether or not you can heal, but I can share my own journey to wholeness, and confirm I have met countless others along the way who have healed even more serious conditions than me. In the latest Dr; Joe Dispenza retreat I attended, a woman had re-grown a part of her bowel!! Based on my personal experiences, I can confirm: we can heal from almost anything - depression, chronic health conditions, PTSD - I've done it, and i've seen others do it, time and time again. That's how I ended up painting. As I stripped down the layers in the pursuit of wholeness, I remembered I loved to paint.  Modern medicine does not ‘heal’. It plugs a hole, or removes pieces of the whole in order to stop the dysfunction quickly. Sometimes this is essential, but often times it is not. I don’t believe you can ‘heal’ this way, but I do believe that for some, it is the best option, and often with this path you can stop a disease process in its tracks. I was upset along my journey, as no one ever told me I could heal – but once I learned you could, there was not going to be any stopping me! So healing, in the truest sense, is not about supplementing the body with an exogenous compound. It’s about exploring the root cause of your ailment, and tracing that right back to its origins. WHAT GOES OUT OF BALANCE CAN FIND BALANCE ONCE AGAIN I’ve turned by back on both the medical and psychiatric system, and healed from depression, anxiety, PTSD, chronic fatigue, food allergies and body dysmorphia. Meditation, lifestyle, shamanism, somatic therapy, psychotherapy, plant medicines, sound healings and internal family systems work, they all helped me along this path. I no longer struggle with, or identify with having those conditions, though there are remnants of my illness at times – but this is offers me a much higher quality of life than I was looking at before I started the journey. We are each on our own journeys and no path looks the same.  With all that said, know I’ve met countless others who have healed from the most terrifying of illnesses or circumstances, all because they decided to heal, and opened up to the possibility, instead of stopping at the diagnosis point. Healing is about working with the body, trusting its capacity. It’s about getting out of our own way, opening up to a higher power (your power, and the power of your body). When you do that, you find yourself truly healing your body, mind and heart. Jen x